The president also headed South on Jan. 4
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Forget those ‘baseless claims’: Biden reveals what really happened ‘if I had stolen the election’
SATIRE To commemorate the “completely fair and honest” 2020 election, Joe Biden has announced a brand new memoir called If I Rigged It. The book is already being met with critical acclaim for its compelling description of a totally hypothetical situation where Biden and the Democrats fraudulently steal the election. “Listen here, Jack — I didn’t steal the election,” said […]
Ruling class update: FDA approves fake vaccine for celebrity photo ops
SATIRE WASHINGTON — The FDA has approved a fake vaccine for staged photo shoots by celebrities and politicians, the administration announced today. After reviewing the placebo vaccine for weeks, FDA experts confirmed it was totally safe for celebrities to take while posting selfies to social media telling you to get vaccinated. “We are proud to […]
Job’s comeback renegotiated: How about a $600 stimulus check?
SATIRE Despite the scriptural evidence that God restored all of Job’s fortunes after his devastating losses, scholars now believe God actually mailed Job a $600 stimulus check to compensate him for his trouble. According to new evidence, God considered restoring and even doubling all of Job’s property, but after lengthy discussions, he decided six hundred […]
Twitter hits God with warning, unwittingly outs ‘fact-checker’
SATIRE Twitter has slapped a warning label on God’s claim that Adam and Eve will surely die if they eat of the tree of the knowledge of good and evil. Citing a well-known expert on God’s Word, Satan, Twitter claimed the content of the tweet was in dispute. “This claim that you will surely die […]
Nancy Pelosi to America: ‘You’re welcome’
SATIRE WASHINGTON, D.C.—In a historic compromise, the Senate and U.S. House of Representatives have finally settled on a stimulus package for Americans struggling and out of work. In addition to bailouts, money for pet projects, and payouts to unions, Congress has authorized a very special $5 off coupon to Applebee’s. “We are proud to have come […]
That’s why he gets paid the big bucks
FUNNIES Townhall
Have no fear: Your corporate media are on the job
FUNNIES Townhall
Seasons greetings to the Politburo Standing Committee of the Chinese Communist Party
FUNNIES Townhall
President Trump stuns press with UFO announcement
SATIRE In a historic press conference, Trump confirmed to the world that extraterrestrials exist and that they are in contact with the U.S. Government. Unfortunately, they won’t reveal themselves until humanity has evolved to the point where they will re-elect Trump as President of the United States. “I know the aliens, talked with the aliens, […]